


just a small thing

by cherrykirsch



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: <<< more accurately a suspected miscarriage, (To Yachi's Mother), Comfort, Comfort/Angst, Developing Relationship, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Feel-good, Fluff and Angst, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Miscarriage, Parenthood, Past Relationship(s), Pregnancy, Romance, Self-Doubt, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Talking, Unplanned Pregnancy, everyone would kill for yachi, resignation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-29
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2020-03-29 11:30:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19019026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cherrykirsch/pseuds/cherrykirsch
Summary: Yachi gets pregnant, her (now ex) boyfriend ignores her, and Kuroo offers to pretend to be the father of her child at a dinner with her mother.There's no way this can go wrong, right?





	1. the beginning / twelve weeks

**ONE**

 

Yachi stands, staring blankly at the rows of boxes in front of her.

Clearblue, Check One, P-Check, do test. Her hand trembles as she picks a box off the shelf and reads the writing in a blue bubble across the front. _‘Early Detection_!’ it boasts and Yachi draws her bottom lip between her teeth. ‘ _The only pregnancy test that tells you how many weeks!_ ’. A woman rounds the corner and Yachi fumbles as she hurries to place the box back on the shelf and turns, fixes her eyes somewhere else, pretending to be very interested in—

Tears prick in her eyes. Condoms.

The woman doesn’t even glance in her direction as she walks down the aisle, picks up a packet of vitamins and leaves. Yachi immediately turns back to the boxes, chewing on her bottom lip as she scans the shelf up and down, side to side, as if just being in the presence of these boxes would tell her if she was pregnant or not. In the end, she’s not even sure which one she should choose, and even then, it may be too early to tell; maybe the early detection one would be good, but what if that brand had a history of giving out false negatives? Should she get more than one brand just to be sure?  
Yachi’s eyes begin to fill with tears, and she scoops nine of the boxes into her arms and heads to the counter to pay, grabbing a big bottle of water on the way. She avoids eye contact as the cashier rings her up, and again as she swipes her card, and then she flees the scene as fast as her legs will take her.

Good thing she went to a drugstore outside of her neighborhood. Now she can never go back there again.

Her head swims as she unlocks her bike and pushes herself off and towards her apartment, and then she blinks and she’s locking her bike up again, 10 whole minutes of her life lost to anxiety and worry and when she blinks again she’s opening her apartment door and Kiyoko is sitting on the sofa, eating buttery toast and eggs.

“I heard you rush out this morning,” Kiyoko says as she closes the door, and Yachi starts, letting out a weak laugh. “Did you need to get more painting supplies?”

Yachi nods, tucking the bag behind her back. “Yeah, uh,” she says, hesitating with a flickering smile. “I needed watercolor pens.”

She winces at her own stupidity but Kiyoko doesn’t even seem to notice. “Sounds cool.” She says.

“It is,” Yachi assures her, trying her best to sound enthusiastic. “I need to go to the bathroom.”

Kiyoko turns and looks about to open her mouth to say something, but Yachi darts away before she can, barreling into the bathroom and locking the door behind her with a sense of finality. She sits, breathing heavily and almost crying against the door as she uncaps her bottle of water and begins to chug, then she gets all her tests out of the plastic bag and lies them out before her.

Which one?

A gentle knock sounds from the other side of the door and Yachi jumps.

“Yacchan?” Kiyoko’s voice says, sound very worried. “Are you alright?”

Yachi opens her mouth to assure her that _everything was actually better than alright, Kiyoko, but thanks for worrying_ —instead, a small whimper comes out, a tear rolling down her cheek. “No.” She manages, breathless and feeling so very, very upset as she chokes on her tears. “Nothing is alright, Kiyoko.”

There is silence for a moment and then, “Can I come in?”

Immediately Yachi reaches up to fumble with the lock on the door and the moment the click sounds Kiyoko opens to door to find Yachi crouched on the group, surrounded by nine pregnancy tests, sobbing into the sleeves of her flannel shirt. Yachi admits that the image sounds pathetic, even for her, but Kiyoko doesn’t seem to care about that, she just crouches down next to her and holds her hands. 

She lets Yachi cry until her tears turn into sniffles and then she reaches down to pick up a box, looking it over before she looks back to Yachi. “Why didn’t you tell me, Yaachan?” She asks and Yachi’s heart tugs. “We have these underneath the bathroom sink.”

All sadness she feels is immediately washed away, her lips part and then she crawls across the floor, opening the cupboard beneath the sink to find, low and behold, a box identical to one of her own, the corners smashed, with one lone test stick inside stares her right in the face.

She blinks at it, and then she laughs. 

“Silly me.” Yachi laughs to herself, fresh tears rolling down her cheeks as she plucks the test from the box with trembling hands. “I should have looked here first, or told you; I’m sorry I lied, Kiyoko, I wasn’t buying watercolor pens.” The minute the words pass her lips she realizes how trivial it sounds.

Kiyoko immediately wraps her arms around Yachi’s shoulders, hugging her close. “You were scared, don’t even think of apologizing.” She says and her voice is so soothing, Yachi rubs at her eyes to stop the tears from flowing again. “We can take all of your tests, and mine, and then we’ll go to a doctor okay? I’ve been in the same position as you before, Yacchan, and the possibility of you being pregnant is less than 15%, and it’s so scary but so unlikely.”

Not finding the words to say anything, Yachi just nods and Kiyoko gives her a reassuring smile before handing her the water bottle.

“Drink all this up, okay? I’ll wait here with you.” She says.

Yachi uncaps the water bottle and drinks the rest of it in less than five minutes, as she does so, Kiyoko removes all the different tests from their boxes and lays them out in neat little rows for Yachi to pick and choose from. When Yachi stands, reaching for the first one, Kiyoko ducks out of the door, and while Yachi’s heart leaps in her chest, she’s glad she left the door open just a crack.  
As Yachi sits on the toilet, three pregnancy tests in one hand and three in the other, like some kind of fertility Wolverine, she wonders what will happen if they come out positive. Her heart thunders in her chest and she immediately pushes the thought out of mind, capping up the six pregnancy tests in her hands before she finishes the final four, flushes the toilet and immediately skitters as far away as she can from them.

After a minute of Yachi shoving herself as flat against the wall as she can get herself, head in her hands, Kiyoko peeks around the door and then steps inside, wrapping Yachi up into her arms and rocking her gently. Like a baby. And it’s all too much. Yachi sobs into the front of Kiyoko’s t-shirt, her knuckles white as she bunches the fabric into a ball in her fists, all the while Kiyoko strokes her hair and holds her close and talks in quiet, nonsense whispers that she has to strain to hear.

“No matter what happens,” Kiyoko says as Yachi’s sobs quiet into small, wet hiccups. “We’ll work it out, Yacchan. I’ll help you every step of the way.” Yachi nods numbly and then looks over to the rows of tests lined up on the counter. Kiyoko pushes a wet strand of hair away from her cheek. 

“You ready?” Kiyoko asks, and Yachi isn’t sure. 

She pushes herself to her feet, squeezing Kiyoko’s hand in her own as she makes her way over to the tests, and then stops short, closing her eyes just before she looks down at them. 

“I don’t wanna look.” She says quietly.

“Do you want me to look for you?” Kiyoko asks, and Yachi nods twice very quickly. “Do you want me to tell you what the result is?”

Yachi bites her lip and then nods once, very slowly. “Okay.”

She feels Kiyoko let go of her hand and move past her. There is a moment of silence and Yachi feels her heart begin to thud in her chest, her blood roaring in her ears as she breathes shakily, squeezing her eyes shut so firmly she feels as if she can seal them shut forever, and then Kiyoko takes her gently in her arms.

Kiyoko’s breath fans over her ear and her hair tickles her nose and then, she whispers very quietly into Yachi’s ear; “They’re positive, I’m so sorry Yacchan.”

Yachi nods shakily. “Oh… Oh…” She mumbles, her eyes flickering open as she stares down at the mixture of double pink lines and blue crosses. She swallows thickly. “Okay. We can deal with this right? We’ll figure out something, right Kiyoko? Because I told him I might be and he hasn’t answered me, he’s ignoring me.”

Kiyoko frowns. “Iwai?” She asks and Yachi nods slowly. “But I thought you two were happy I thought you two were together… Why… why would he do that to you?”

“I…” Yachi begins, her bottom lip trembling. “I don’t know.” 

Kiyoko goes silent for a moment, her arms still tight around Yachi. “Do you want to keep it, Yacchan?” She asks and Yachi thinks, biting her lip. “I won’t say anything either way, this is your decision, and I want you to be sure of it.” 

“I’ve… never really thought about it…” Yachi trails off, tears pricking in her eyes again. “I… can I even raise a baby? Would… it be bad if I didn’t want it? Would I even be a good enough mother?”

Kiyoko pulls back and cups Yachi’s face gently, stroking over her cheekbone with a thumb. “I have no doubt you’d be an excellent mother, Yachi, but you don’t have to do that if you don’t want to.” Kiyoko assures her, and the relief that she feels at that is immeasurable. “But whatever decision you make, I want you to be sure of it, sure of yourself.”

Yachi looks down at her belly then, and then she slowly peels her shirt from it, hiking it up and tucking it beneath her armpits. She blinks at it. “Can I poke it?” She asks. “Or will that hurt it?”

“It shouldn’t hurt it,” Kiyoko tells her with a faint smile. “Go on.”

So Yachi does. She pokes her belly once, and it feels a little bit firmer, a weirder sensation underneath her finger, and then she places her palm over it, very gently. Then she pulls away and drops her shirt hugging herself around the middle, and Kiyoko gives her a very serious look.

“Yachi, are you considering an abortion?” She asks and Yachi goes very still for a moment from the bluntness of Kiyoko’s words.

She thinks and then she shakes her head. “No.” She says. “I don’t think I want to do that.”

“You’re sure?” Kiyoko asks.

“Yes.”

Kiyoko smiles and gives Yachi’s hand a squeeze. “Then that’s amazing, Yacchan.” She says and Yachi smiles back faintly, returning the hand squeeze. “I’ll call up and get you a doctor’s appointment, and we’ll go together to register your pregnancy once the doctor confirms.”

Yachi nods and bites her lip. “Okay.” She says quietly.

Kiyoko takes Yachi by the shoulders and leads her into the kitchen. “Let’s make some tea and watch YouTube.” She says, and Yachi smiles and nods, feeling at ease and entirely peaceful.

* * *

Two days later, the small blue-covered handbook and the white keychain is proof of her pregnancy and Yachi isn’t quite sure what to think about it. Both things lie on the table, and while she knows she should attach the keychain to her bag, it seems too final and too daunting to even begin to think about. Kiyoko is the only one who knows, and she doesn’t want to have to tell her mother; she doesn’t know what she’ll say.  
Yet, here she is, staring down at the book and the keychain, dressed in her comfiest clothes while Kiyoko busies herself in the kitchen, and with a start she remembers she should be putting them away, not staring at them, and she gathers them up carefully in her hands and hides them beneath a magazine on the bookshelf.

But not before removing a rectangular piece of glossy paper from it.

“How many months are you?” Kiyoko asks, turning slightly towards Yachi as she stares down at the paper in her hands. “Did the doctor tell you?”

Yachi nods. “Twelve weeks.” She says, and then she offers the paper to Kiyoko. “They gave me a picture of it because I asked for a copy. I know it just looks fuzzy but I know where the top and bottom is.”

Kiyoko places down her chopsticks and takes the picture gently, looking it over with a fond smile before she hands it back. “It looks lovely.” She tells her before she turns back to the sizzling frying pan. “Where are you gonna keep the picture? In your purse?”

Yachi holds it close to her heart and then walks towards the fridge, fiddling with the cute cat magnets on it. “Can I put it on the fridge?” She asks and Kiyoko stills. 

“The captains are coming over tonight.” Kiyoko says very plainly. “They’ll see.”

“It means I won’t have to tell them.” Yachi says, focusing very intently on the fridge magnets. “And I want to. I’m proud of it for growing, my 15% chance.” 

Kiyoko laughs at that. “Fair enough.” She says with a smile. “Go ahead.” 

With a smile, Yachi attaches the photo to the fridge and then steps back to admire it. Even from a few steps away she could point out the fuzzy top of what would be her baby’s head, but truth be told it just looks like a tadpole. She looks at it, eyes narrowing, and then she begins to bite her lip.

“Is this a good idea?” She asks.

“Everything will be fine.” Kiyoko tells her, and she’s never been wrong before. “We still have time before the boys come over, so you have the opportunity to take it down if you don’t want them to know yet. Don’t worry, Yacchan.” 

Yachi nods at that, offers a small smile and then fiddles with the hem of her jumper. “I wonder what Daichi will say, and Suga…” She says softly and mostly to herself, staring at the small sonogram square. “Will they be happy for me? I tried calling Iwai, by the way.”

Kiyoko stills for a moment over the pan, chopsticks looking about the clatter to the floor before she shifts them back in her hands, shaking the pan more vigorously. “Did you?” She asks, trying to sound civil though if anything she just sounds very, very angry. “Did he pick up? Reply to your text?”

Yachi shakes her head and hugs her stomach, padding away from the fridge to curl up on the sofa. “No.” She says, her voice barely above a whisper. “The machine told me he blocked my number.”

“Fucker.” Kiyoko hisses, slamming the bottle of soy sauce down on the kitchen counter, clattering very loudly through the kitchen as she begins to mix something else in another bowl. “If he even thinks about showing up here I’m going to wring his neck.” 

Yachi bites her lip and decides not to say anything to that, and instead pulls a blanket over herself and rests her hands over her stomach, her thumbs tracing the slightest of a bump as she shrinks slowly beneath the warmth of the blanket. The TV is murmuring quietly in the background, stuck on some old gameshow she and Kiyoko usually watch around this time in the evening if they have nothing else to do, and even though it’s a rerun, she still finds herself chuckling along to the funny bits.  
She looks away as the commercials come on, and begins to pick at a piece of fluff on the blanket, glancing at the clock to check the time. Less than an hour until Daichi and Suga arrive, overly early as always, and her heart hammers in her chest—she looks back at the sonogram photo and leaps up from the sofa.

Kiyoko catches her moving from the corner of her eye and whirls around just in time to see Yachi carefully pulling the photo from the fridge.

“Are you taking it down?” She asks her, and Yachi shakes her head. “What are you doing then?”

Yachi clutches the photo to her chest and then begins to edge out of the kitchen and into the hallway to her bedroom, an eager smile on her face. “If I’m going to tell the captains tonight, I might as well make it special and make it look pretty.” She says and Kiyoko looks baffled but gives her an encouraging smile as she closes her bedroom door.

Pulling the photo back from her chest, Yachi stares at it for a moment and then kisses a fingertip and presses it against where the top of the tadpole’s head would be and hold it there, tenderly, just for a moment. Then Yachi pulls on a paint-covered t-shirt, sits herself and the photo down on the desk with a pile of white cards and gets to work.

* * *

By the time the cards are ready, stacked up on the middle of the coffee table, Yachi slides into the entry way as Daichi and Suga arrive, all the other captains trailing after them. Kiyoko and Yachi can only stand to the side and watch everyone pour into the living room, blinking at the sight. Just as Kiyoko goes to close the door, Hinata leaps into view, dragging Kageyama behind him as he greets Yachi with an exuberant hug and then shuffles into the living room when Kiyoko says he’s clogging the entry way. 

Sure enough, the shoes by the door are a sort of organized chaos.

Daichi offers a sheepish smile as Kiyoko offers to take his coat from him. “We ran into them all at the station, thought we might as well all walk together.” He says with a hint of an apology. “There was a bit of a holdup because of frost and ice on the tracks, but we’re all good now.” 

Hinata drapes his coat over the back of a chair and takes Yachi’s hand in his own. “Yacchan! You’ve got paint on your nose!” He says, reaching up to swipe at the end of her nose and then grinning. “There! All gone! How’s your course? Have you made any more art?” 

Yachi laughs as Kageyama picks up Hinata’s jacket and then elbows Hinata gently in the side, Hinata pouts and makes an over exaggerated whine, but doesn’t complain. “Give her space to breathe.” He says with a roll of his eyes and Yachi watches them both fondly. “You look nice, Yacchan.”

“Thank you.” Yachi replies with a grin, just as Oikawa, Bokuto and Kuroo approach. “Kuroo, Oikawa, Bokuto; It’s lovely to see you all!”

Bokuto hoots and wraps Yachi into a bone crushing hug, and Kiyoko is immediately at her side, ready to help Yachi back to the ground when Bokuto puts her back. Kiyoko looks concerned but Yachi just smiles, protesting with a pout when Kuroo pats her head and Oikawa wraps an arm around her shoulders.

“You’re looking positively exquisite, Yacchan!” Oikawa says, turning with a look of faux disapproval to Kageyama. “Tch. Bakeyama, you don’t know how to talk to a lady.” He says, and the minute Kageyama frowns, Oikawa gives him a small smile; no harm done.

Bokuto nods eagerly in agreement. “Exactly! Your dungarees are so cute, all painted pockets, and your cardigan is soft!” He says, voice small with awe as he gently brushes his fingers against the wool and then pulls back. “I haven’t seen you in so long! It feels like forever.”

Yachi watches as tears pool in Bokuto’s eyes and she coos, moving forward to hold one of his hands with two of her own. “I missed you too, Bokuto. You make the best iced tea.” She says and Bokuto perks up immeasurably. “I’ve actually been craving it recently; would you bring me some next time you come visit?” 

“Of course!” he says, almost vibrating with excitement.

“I think you just made his entire week.” Kuroo says with an amused smirk as he looks down at her. “But he’s right, you look cute, Yachi.” She giggles at that, cheeks twinging pink as she shoves her hands in her pockets. “Oh, we got you something—we were just hanging around Kyoto on a trip, and we saw something we thought you’d like.” He says, offering Yachi a small, sunflower-patterned gift bag.

She takes it with an eager smile and quickly shifts the tissue paper to pull out the small black box beneath it. She places the bag on the floor and then opens the box, lips parting in surprise.

“Pearlescent liquid acrylic, oh! I’ve been wanting some of this for years but I’ve never… never had the money to buy it… oh, it’s expensive, Kuroo you really shouldn’t have…” She begins, overwhelmed with emotion as tears well in her eyes, hugging the box to her chest. “Just… thank you, Kuroo.”

Kuroo looks startled when she looks back at him, and he rests a hand on her arm, squeezing gently. “Are you alright?” He asks, watching as she wipes away her tears with a fist

Yachi laughs at the frightened look on his face and waves him off. “I’m fine, just a little bit emotional.” She assures him. “Thank you very much for your gift.”

Hinata looks over to her with a small frown. “Where’s Iwai, Yacchan?” He asks and her heart immediately sinks. “I was excited to see him again!”

Yachi forces a smile onto her lips, letting out an uneasy laugh. “He had an emergency.” She manages. “Hospital.”

“We should go sit in the living room.” Kiyoko suggests before Hinata can reply, and she urges Yachi ahead of her.

Yachi takes her seat on the sofa with Hinata quickly leaping at her side and Kageyama quick to follow. Daichi, Suga and Oikawa quickly take the other seats and Kiyoko offers Kuroo and Bokuto a pillow to sit on. Ushijima, she notices, is already sitting cross-legged on the floor, and when she waves at him, he smiles just a little bit and waves back.  
As she looks away, her eyes catch the pile of envelopes in the middle of the table and her heart leaps into her chest, and then she looks at Kiyoko, who gives her a soft look and bends to pick up the pile.

“Before we all have dinner, Yachi made a little something for each of you.” Kiyoko says with a smile, and Bokuto, Hinata and Oikawa immediately perk up. “She really wants to see your reactions, so I’m going to hand them out; but don’t open it until everyone else has theirs!”

All the men murmur in agreement and Kiyoko hands the pile of cards to Suga, who takes one and hands the pile to the next person. As soon as the final person in the semi-circle, Oikawa, gets his card, Hinata is already bouncing up and down on the edge of the sofa, fingernail under the flap of the envelope.

“Can we open them now?” He asks, shooting a look over at Yachi.

She stifles a laugh and hides her face behind her hands. “Go ahead!” She chirps, voice wavering. 

The sound of ripping paper fills her ears and then Suga laughs, accompanied by Daichi. And then she hears the flap of the paper and she shrinks further in her seat as the entire room goes deathly silent. It stays like that for a minute and when Yachi looks up, every eye on the room is on her, the front of the cards glaring at her from every direction, proclaiming: ‘ _A new volleyball player is joining the team!_ ’. 

Tears begin to pool in her eyes as she sniffles into her hands. “Do… do you not like them?” She asks very softly.

Hinata immediately pounces on her, arms wrapped firmly around her neck as he hugs her tight. “You’re going to have a baby, Yacchan! Congratulations!” He shrieks into her ear and she laughs into the shoulder of his shirt, hugging him tightly back, and then he jerks his head around to look at Kageyama with a grin so wide she’s afraid it’ll split his cheeks. “A _baby_ , Tobio! Can we be the uncles? OH! Can I teach them to play volleyball?!”

Yachi laughs again and pulls back to wipe away her tears, feeling very bashful. “That’s why I wrote the card, silly.” She says and Hinata shrieks with excitement, only silencing when Kageyama tugs him back.

“Careful,” Kageyama tells him. “You’ll hurt its ears.”

Oikawa rolls his eyes. “The baby probably doesn’t even have ears yet, Bakeyama.” He says and Kageyama scowls.

“I know that.” He grumbles. 

Hinata just cups Kageyama’s face with his hands, letting out an exaggerated coo. “You were just being sweet!” he says and Kageyama flushes pink when Hinata kisses his cheek. “It’s cute.”

Bokuto boos loudly. “Ew, PDA!” He says with a very disapproving tone of voice. “There are children present. Even if that child is inside Yacchan. For now.”

Yachi giggles at that. “That sounds so ominous!” She says, smacking a hand over her mouth as her body shakes with the force of her laughter. “Sounds like you’re going to remove it yourself.”

“What do you think, Yacchan?” Bokuto asks as he pulls off his cardigan and wraps it around his shoulder, moving his arms into a cradling gesture as if he was ready to hold a baby. “I could be a good midwife don’t you think? I’m a very calming mentor.”

Kuroo snorts and Bokuto glares. “I am!” Bokuto protests.

“No offense, Kou, but you’re the least calming person I know.” Kuroo says. “But, like, in a good way.”

Bokuto chirps up at that and looks satisfied with the answer as he looks down at his card again and reads it over in his head. 

“Congratulations, Yacchan!” Suga says, standing up to move over to Yachi and wrap her into a hug. “Do you know the gender yet? Or is it too soon?”

“Too soon.” Yachi says, resting a hand over her stomach. “But I don’t care which it is.”

Oikawa grins. “Everyone says that.”

“I mean it!” Yachi protests, still smiling, and then she looks to Suga. “Thank you, Suga. You’re always welcome to come see the baby whenever you like.” 

Suga grins, his eyes twinkling. “Oh, I won’t be able to leave you two alone.” He says and then he gives her one last hug before he pulls away. “Stay safe.”

Daichi smiles and squeezes Suga’s hand when he sits back down, the card open in his lap. “I’m assuming this little bean is Iwai’s; does he know yet? I’m sure he must be just as excited as you, if not more!” 

Yachi’s face immediately falls and she’s suddenly very aware of all the eyes on her as she laughs very nervously and straightens up in her seat, fiddling with the cuffs of her cardigan. “That’s the funniest thing, Daichi! You won’t believe it!” She begins, wincing as the pitch of her voice rises into a squeak at the end of every word. “Iwai does know that I’m pregnant, which is, um, great, wouldn’t want it any other way honestly! But—and here’s the funny bit, Daichi, you’re going to love it—well, um, he had to take some time to think after I told him because, y’know, this is big, big, _big_ news! And then, I went to my appointment the other day and I called him, the machine told me that his number was unavailable! Funny, right?!”

As Yachi laughs weakly at her own attempt of trying to keep things light and airy, the room falls deathly silent. Yachi trails off and then shoves her head into her hands, trying desperately to stop her tears from flowing, and she stays like that for a while until she’s calmed down enough to look up.

Across from her, Kuroo has the stormiest look she’s ever seen. It’s scary, really, the narrowed eyes and the tensed body, the hands clenched into fists and the pure look of murder in his eyes. She shrinks back into the sofa.

“I’m going to tear his balls off.” Kuroo growls and Yachi’s eyes widen. “If he ever, ever comes near you after this Yacchan I’m going to fucking kill him for you, if you want that. If you don’t want that I’ll just break his nose for you. How fucking _dare he_.” 

 A fresh round of tears pool in Yachi’s eyes as she looks at Kuroo, feels the sincerity of his words deep in her bones. “I don’t want you to get hurt.” She manages, her eyes flickering around the room, drinking in the sight of eight very angry men. “Any of you.” 

Kiyoko immediately wraps her arms around Yachi’s shoulders and glares at them. “None of you are breaking anyone’s nose.” She tells them and a roar of protest fills the room, only to silenced by a sharp look. “Yachi doesn’t need you to break his nose, what she needs you to be there for her and for the baby. If any of you go after Iwai, I’ll come after you.”

The men grumble but concede, slinking back into their seats as Yachi sniffles quietly into the neck of her jumper.

“Are you going to do it without Iwai?” Sugar asks very gently, and when Yachi nods he smiles. “We’ll be there to help you Yacchan. Don’t you even worry.”

Yachi shoves her hands over her eyes and curls up into Kiyoko’s side. “Is it wrong of me to raise them alone?” She asks, hoping the sofa cushions will just open and swallow her whole. “Is it wrong of me to keep them when they don’t have a father?”

Something clasps down hard on her hand and she looks up into Hinata’s wide, warm brown eyes, his and Kageyama’s hand clamped onto hers. “Yacchan, your baby won’t want a father, not with all the amazing uncles they have; you can tell them whatever you want about Iwai, you can tell them nothing at all, but they won’t want for love.” He says and Yachi stares at him before she promptly bursts into tears, and Hinata gasps in horror, hands flying up to hold her shoulders. “I’m sorry, Yacchan! Did I say something wrong? Oh, no… I’m sorry!”

Yachi shakes her head and throws herself onto him, wrapping her arms tight around his neck. “You didn’t do anything wrong.” She says, voice muffled by the soft cotton of his sweatshirt, relief washing over her in waves. “You did everything right. Thank you, Shou.”

 Daichi smiles fondly at his underclassmen, and Yachi catches his eye with a faint smile as she pulls back. “So,” he says. “Does your mother know yet?”

Yachi freezes and slowly, jerkily shakes her head, wringing her hands in her lap. “She didn’t even know I was dating Iwai. We… we were meant to go over for dinner next month, I was going to tell her at the end of the month.” She says softly, almost too quietly to hear. “I… what will she say when I turn up like… _this_?” She finishes, gesturing to her stomach. 

Suga gives her a sympathetic smile. “You know I’d offer Yacchan, but your mother already knows me, she knows me and Dai are dating.” He says and Yachi smiles back. 

“I know.” She says. “It’s a sweet thought, Suga.”

“I would too,” Hinata pipes up, looking very guilty. “But she knows me too and… I could never… she’s so scary! She makes my stomach hurt.” He says with a frown and Yachi stifles a laugh.

Yachi sighs lightly and rests a hand over her belly. “I guess I’ll just have to tell her and face everything head on.” She says softly. “No point in hiding now.” Her eyes slide across the room and rest for a moment on Kuroo, who sits watching her with a strange sort of intensity that doesn’t scare her, eyes as deep as pools. She looks away. “Kiyoko, dinner time?” 

Kiyoko smiles and stands, looking towards Bokuto, Daichi and Suga. “I need help bringing the plates through.” She says, and Bokuto leaps up excitedly, following close at Kiyoko’s heels as Daichi and Suga stifle laughter and follow behind the two.

Yachi stands and pulls the sleeves of the cardigan over her hands, before she walks around the sofa and down the hall. It’s only when she gets half way down that she realizes someone is following her and she turns around to find Kuroo standing about a meter away, hands shoved into his pockets. If it had been anyone else, she might have been scared.

“I wanted to apologize,” he says, softly and gently, his voice hardly reaching her ears. “I probably scared you, being all angry like I was. It’s not fair on you or the baby. I… you need to be happy and healthy for the baby.” 

Yachi stares at him for a moment, and then she smiles, confusion melting into a pleased sort of bliss. “Thank you, Kuroo, that’s very sweet.” She says, resting her hand on the door handle to her left. “Apology accepted. Go enjoy dinner, I’ll just be a moment—” She twists the door handle and then Kuroo stops her, a hand resting on the wall next to her head.

“There’s another thing.” He says, and his face is so close to hers, and she feels so small next to him and she trembles gently, not frightened, but as if she’s anticipating something.

“Y-Yes?” She squeaks.

She watches as Kuroo thinks, his tongue poking out to wet his lips. “If you wanted,” He begins gently, almost unsure of how to continue. “I could pretend to be the father for the dinner with your mother.”

Yachi pauses, lips parted and eyes wide. “You… what?!” She says sharply, dragging a breath in between her teeth. “Kuroo, I can’t… I can’t ask that of you. It would be dishonest and… and unfair and…”

“I _want_ to.” Kuroo says, and he sounds so sure, so honest that Yachi just stares. “And I want to make Iwai unhappy, make him hurt for leaving someone like you.”

Yachi tilts her head. “Like me?”

“Someone gentle,” He says softly and her heart melts. “Someone good and patient, so smart and wise.”

Yachi wets her lips, thinking, and then she smiles faintly and gives him a nod. “Okay.” She says and her voice feels too high. “I’ll text you.”

Kuroo grins, and he looks entirely breathless, drawing back from her to shove his hands back into his jeans pocket, toeing the wooden floor with his slipper. “Cool.” He says with a pleased nod and a feline grin. “Cool, nice. I’ll… I’ll be looking forward to your text.” Yachi smiles nervously, toying with the door handle, and pushes the door open. “Are you upset?” He asks and she pauses again. 

She looks up into his eyes. “Oh no,” She says very seriously, half wanting to just skitter into the bathroom and leave him waiting in the hallway. “I just really, really need to use the bathroom.” 

Kuroo flushes pink and laughs, drawing back from her. “Yeah,” he says. “Of course. I’m sorry! That was stupid of me.” 

Yachi steps into the bathroom with a smile. “Go eat, I’ll be two minutes.” She says, and then she closes the door softly between them.

She presses herself up against the back of the door, hand pressed over her chest and another over her mouth, a silly grin on her face as she tries to calm her thundering heart.


	2. suspected trouble / almost sixteen weeks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw// miscarriage stuff (but all is well, dw!!)

**_TWO_ **

 

Yachi wakes at 2am, sore and feeling vaguely sticky. As she blinks herself semi-awake and waddles in to the bathroom, switching on the light, she wonders if she waited too long to go to the bathroom last night and frowns, but when she looks down to pull down her pajama shorts she stops dead, thumbs hooked in the waistband and hands trembling.

Her thighs and the crotch of her shorts are practically soaked in scarlet blood.

Her lip wobbles and she stumbles back into her room, snatching her phone on the bedside table and unlocking it hurriedly, swiping through her contacts. Hinata and Kageyama—too far away. Daichi and Suga—also too far away. Kiyoko—sleeping, she has a test in the morning, Yachi doesn’t want to wake her. Kuroo—her thumb hovers before she swipes again, staring at his name so long the letters are etched onto the back of her skull; he’s only 10 minutes away walking, he told her to text him for that dinner with her mother.

“Hello?” His voice echoes from her phone and Yachi starts, almost dropping the phone back onto her mattress and she winces, lifting her phone to her ear. “Yachi? Is everything okay?” 

Yachi opens her mouth and then closes again, her chest heaving as she begins to hyperventilate. “Yes! Uhm… no, uh, Kuroo, can you come take me to the hospital?” She asks, wincing at her voice again, and from the other end of the line she hears the crinkle of bed covers and the sound of a light switch being flipped. “I… uhm, I’m bleeding. Like… a lot.” 

“Did you cut yourself?” He asks, and Yachi feels the hot flush of embarrassment crawl up the back of her neck as she looks at the far wall. 

“No,” she says, her voice quitting into an almost mumble. “It’s… from the… y'know… it's… the baby.”

There is silence and then the sound changes to something echoic and she realizes she is on speaker phone. “I’ll be right over.” Kuroo says and she can hear him pulling something on and a rustle as he picks up the phone, and then seconds later the clinks of metal. “I’m taking Bo’s car so I’ll be there as quick as I can, two minutes. You… change, okay? Clean up and put on a pad, and we’ll go straight to the hospital.” 

Yachi nods numbly. “Okay.” She whispers. “I’m sorry.” 

“You don’t have to apologize.” Kuroo tells her firmly and tears prick in her eyes. “I’ll be two minutes.”

“Bye bye.” 

She hears his soft chuckle. “Bye bye, Yacchan.” 

Yachi throws her phone back onto her bed and waddles back into the bathroom after digging in her drawers for a pair of stretchy joggers and underwear. Kuroo arrives four minutes later after she’s cleaned herself up and grabbed her phone from her bed, dressed in comfortable baggy clothes and she greets him with a faint smile as she grabs her pregnancy book from the bookshelf and then waddles out the door with his hand on the small of her back.  
Kuroo helps her into the car and she stares out of the window as he gets in and starts up the engine. The radio murmurs faintly and Yachi just clutches her book to her chest and tries to avoid touching her stomach, and she looks down when Kuroo’s hand lands on her knee. 

“Are you okay?” He asks her softly and Yachi shrugs, wincing at how much she leans into his touch.

“I’m scared.” She whispers to him, her voice barely reaching over the rumble of the car engine. “What if… what if I lose them, Kuroo? I got everyone excited for nothing… did I do something wrong?”

Kuroo shakes his head, his lips pressed into a line. “This isn’t your fault, Yacchan, and you shouldn’t think about the worst just yet.” He tells her. “If you lose them, I’ll be there, okay?”

Yachi nods and wipes away the tears pooling in her eyes. “Thank you, Kuroo.” She says and then she lets out a wet laugh, looking down at her hands. “Well, maybe Iwai will take me back now, if, he doesn’t have to deal with a… a baby.”

The car is silent.

Yachi glances over to Kuroo, watching as his jaw clenches and his eyes narrow at the road, his hand still on her knee. He opens his mouth to speak and she looks away again. “Could you ever be with him after this, Yacchan?” He asks her, voice soft but firm. “Could you ever kiss someone and know that you made something together and he just ignored you through the hard parts, and only took you back when it was good for him?”

She opens her mouth and then closes it again, turning back to rest her forehead against the cool window. “I don’t know.” She says. “But maybe it’s worth a shot.” 

“The right person won’t leave you when something hard comes around.” Kuroo tells her and Yachi wishes truly that she could believe it. She nods and bites her lip and closes her eyes. “Hang tight.”

Yachi presses her forehead against the cool of the window, and tries to ignore the waves of nausea that roll over her every few minutes. When she opens her eyes again, she looks down at the book in her hands and traces the yellow duck with the tip of her finger.

“I was hoping for a girl.” She says, her breath fogging up the window. “I… always wanted a girl.”

Kuroo’s head turns towards her slightly, an eyebrow raised over eyes that look like liquid gold, peering so deep into her own that she wants to draw further into herself and lean into him at the same time. It hurts to breathe, not physically, but emotionally, and the words were like a weight being lifted from her shoulders.

He cracks a small smile. “I thought you said you didn’t mind.” And she gives him a weak smile in return.

“I know.”

“You can still have a girl.” Kuroo says, and Yachi closes her eyes again. “It’s not over yet.”

“Maybe.”

A hand, soft, warm and heavy lands on the top of her head and her eyes widen, sitting up straighter to look him in the eye while his are still fixed firmly on the road. He ruffles her hair, fingernails scratching gently at her scalp, and then glances over at her with a tender smile and Yachi hiccups as tears begin to roll down her cheeks.  
She cries, chest heaving with her hands wiping furiously at her eyes, hating the forlorn wails that fill the car and drown out the radio; she’s being a baby again, it’s probably not something she’ll ever grow out of, but she’ll have to a little bit, if she’s going to have a baby herself. 

She looks back at him and clutches at his hand, keeping it firmly on her head for one moment longer, and she looks up to him and doesn’t know what to say through the roiling tears, bubbling up like sparkling water until she manages to choke out, “I was going to call her Asuka.”

“With what kanji?” He asks in return and wordlessly Yachi lifts her hand to trace out the kanji for “to fly” and “bird” with a shaking finger, and Kuroo smiles and ruffles her hair again. “That’s a good name for her. Hold on to it.” 

And she does, she allows Kuroo’s hand to drop from her head and fall back onto the wheel, and she holds her stomach and in her head, she chants, _Asuka, Asuka, Asuka_. She imagines holding her perfect and pink against her chest, her sweet little bird, and she wants to kiss her and tell her that everything will be okay—she thinks of Suga and Daichi and Bokuto and Kuroo, and her waterfall of friends, and she knows that Asuka won’t want for anything, not love or gifts or people, and she wants them all to meet her and know her and see her grow. 

She wants Asuka to have her eyes, and she wants to look into them and whisper into her skin that she loves her.

_Hang on tight, Asuka, baby bird; you’ll be alright._

With a swerve Kuroo pulls into the hospital car park and helps her from the car with a steady hand, leading her through the soft chill of the night and up the steps into the airport lobby, the faint click of the car locking echoing behind her. She takes hold of his hand as she walks up to the reception area, their fingers interlocked, and as she stops in front of the desk, the man at reception looks up. 

“Yachi Hitoka.” Yachi says, her voice hoarse. “I probably should have called ahead but is Doctor Sasaki in? I’m pregnant and experiencing heavy bleeding.”

The man looks back down at the computer in front of him, clicking through a couple of pages before he looks back up at her. “Doctor Sasaki is seeing a patient right now, but if you go to the ER, I’ll page an available nurse to meet you there. Fill this in.” He says, handing her a form that she quickly scrawls all of her details onto before handing it back, and Yachi nods, backing away from the desk, and she stops as he speaks. “You’re lucky, it’s a slow night.”

And Yachi gives him a strained smile. “Thank you.” She says.

Kuroo trails behind her as she follows the signs to the ER, and then their grip is broken as she is whisked away by a nurse who gets her settled into a bed that is surrounded by pale-green curtains and tells her to take off her jumper so she can take blood. She feels exposed in her plain black bralette, but she complies and holds out her arm as the nurse finds the vein on the second try and watches with a blank stare as the blood filters up into a tube.

“Can my friend come in?” She asks and the nurse eyes her a little bit carefully. “He’s worried.”

The nurse removes the needle from her arm and begins to organize the filled tubes around her, scrawling something on the labels. “I offered him a chair,” she says. “But he wouldn’t sit down.” 

Yachi frowns. “He can’t come in?”

“Is he the father of the child?” The nurse asks, and she purses her lips when Yachi shakes her head. “Wait until Doctor Sasaki arrives and ask her.” 

Yachi slumps back in her seat, too tired to argue. “Okay.” 

“Doctor Sasaki will be down in a couple of minutes to do a scan; would you like to go to the bathroom and change your pad?” The nurse asks her and when Yachi nods she disappears with the blood and returns with the hospital gauze underwear and a pad that goes half way up her butt.

She hops down from the bed and waddles to the nearest bathroom, and she changes into the new underwear and the pad with a sort of resignation, but she can’t help but feel hopeful when she realizes she hasn’t been bleeding nearly as much as she thought she had. With a squeeze of her heart Yachi wraps up the pad and throws it away before she arranges her underwear and joggers and exits the bathroom.

When she pushes back the curtain, Doctor Sasaki with her soft face and red-framed glasses is already setting up the ultra-sound machine and turns to give Yachi a smile when she settles herself more comfortably on the bed. 

“Good morning,” She says and Yachi murmurs a ‘good morning’ back. “How was the bleeding when you changed just now?”

Yachi digs her nails into her palm. “Less.” She says, feeling silly at the evident hopefulness in her voice and to her relief Doctor Sasaki looks hopeful as well.

“That’s great, Yachi, shall we take a peek at her?” She asks and Yachi nods furiously. “But first, would you like your friend to come in and hold your hand? He’s just been hanging around by the vending machine, I can go get him for you if you’d like that.” 

Her emotion catches in her throat as she nods. “Please,” she chokes out and her heart thunders in her chest when Doctor Sasaki leaves and returns a moment later with Kuroo hot on her heels and as soon as he crosses the threshold of her tiny curtained room she reaches out for him. “Kuroo.”

He immediately joins her side, a hand ruffling her hair and it’s enough to make her laugh, and Doctor Sasaki fiddles with the machine once more before a faint buzzing fills the room and she turns back to Yachi with the bottle of gel. With a start, she realizes she is still in just her bra but neither seem to care so she just slumps back into her seat.

“This is going to be a little cold, just a warning.” She says and though Yachi braces herself for the chill she still shivers and Kuroo laughs.

She dips her finger into the excess on her stomach and dabs it on Kuroo’s nose, and he immediately recoils and it’s enough to make her laugh again, louder this time and with more warmth. “Don’t laugh.” She tells him with faux seriousness and he grins. 

“Won’t happen again, ma’am.” He says.

When she looks back to Doctor Sasaki, she is observing them with a fond smile and she flushes red. Doctor Sasaki pretends not to notice. “Do you have your book with you?” She asks and Kuroo hands it across to her as Yachi watches in surprise. “You’re just a couple of days’ shy of sixteen weeks, maybe if we’re lucky we can get a peek and see if you’re having a little girl or a little boy, if you’d like to know.”

Immediately Yachi nods, her hair whipping about her face. “Yes. I want to know.” 

Yachi reaches for Kuroo’s hand and he takes it with a firm squeeze, their fingers threading together as Doctor Sasaki puts the book down and reaches for the probe hanging off the machine by a coiled wire. The chill sinks further into her skin as Doctor Sasaki rolls it back and forth over the small bump.

“It may be a bit harder to see because you haven’t drunk much water, but I’m sure we can get a peek.” She says and Yachi nods as she reaches over to the machine and flicks a switch and she almost cries as the static sound of her baby’s heartbeat filters through the speakers. “A heartbeat! That’s amazing, Yachi, and now… if I can get the placement right…” 

She looks at Kuroo with a smile as Doctor Sasaki continues to roll the probe over her stomach, frowning at the screen. “She’s okay.” She whispers to him and Kuroo grins.

“Told you she would be.” He says and Yachi rolls her eyes. “She’s strong, just like you are.”

And just as Yachi’s mouth falls open in surprise she hears the roll of the Machine being tilted towards her and she turns, staring at the blurry bean-shape of her baby, just as Doctor Sasaki points with a smile. “Seems that both of you are right; you’re having a baby girl, Yachi.”

Her heart catches in her throat as she stares at her baby girl, her Asuka, and she holds her free hand to her mouth, squeezing Kuroo’s hand just a little bit tighter and can’t form any words to say.

“Would you like a picture?” Doctor Sasaki asks and Yachi nods again as she begins to take the screenshots on the machine that pop up onto the computer only a few steps away. “Keep an eye on your bleeding for the next few days, it was most likely just a clot on the placenta, since your baby has a lovely strong heartbeat you won’t need to worry.”

Yachi just nods wordlessly and Doctor Sasaki wipes the gel from her stomach after she packs away and turns off the machine, scrawling into Yachi’s maternity book before she slips the still-warm pictures of her baby into the cover for her and hands it back. Kuroo helps her up from the bed and then turns away as she slips her jumper back on and slowly walks out of the curtained area and back to reception and towards Kuroo’s car.

Just as Kuroo pulls open the door to get into the driver’s side, Yachi stops him by tugging on his sleeve, and he pauses, turning back to her, and she smiles up at him.

“Thank you for coming to get me, and for staying with me.” She tells him and Kuroo runs a hand through his hair, his ears bright red.

“It’s nothing, Yacchan, anything for you and Asuka.” He says and then he gently nudges her with his hip. “Besides, what kinda friend would I be if I didn’t come?”

She smiles at that and then grabs his wrist, tugging it towards her. “I want to give you something.” She says when he looks at her with a strange expression and a raised eyebrow, and she shivers when her fingertips meet his warm palm. “Close your eyes, no peeking.” 

He sighs but he is smiling as he closes her eyes, and Yachi can look at him properly. His hair is still messy and half curly, pushes back slightly from the faint purple circles under his eyes, and beneath the harsh white floodlights of the car park, he looks handsome—all edges at the slop of his jaw and his shoulders, and with angular eyes and a crooked smile.  
Yachi blinks and it’s enough to break her out of her stupor, and, in a hurry, she pulls one of the pictures from her baby book and presses it into the palm of his hand, holding it there so it won’t escape in the breeze.

“Okay,” she says quietly. “Open your eyes.” 

And he does, blinking down at the picture in his hand with a look of wonder and then back up to her, her hand dropping to her side as he holds the picture right over his heart. “You want to give me a picture of Asuka?” He asks her, and she smiles at how unsure he sounds, and she nods.

“Of course.” She says and she nudges him with her hip. “You’re the first one to get a picture of her. Feel special.”

Kuroo grins. “I do, I really do.” He says and when he reaches for his pocket Yachi frowns in confusion that quickly disappears when she spies the leather of his wallet in his hand, watching as he folds the picture a little smaller and tucks it into the plastic covered space for photographs before he tucks his wallet away again. “Thank you, Yacchan.”

He leans closer to her, and she thinks he’s going to wrap her into a hug, but he brushes back her fringe and presses a small kiss to her temple, and then pauses. She stares at his shirt, the name of the band swirling and the letters muddling, he’s so close she can smell him, the same peppermint body wash that Bokuto uses filtering under the warm, almost piney smell of his deodorant—one that reminds her of her time spent in Karasuno gym watching her boys practice.  
Carefully, she peers up at him and he is looking down at her, his cheeks red and his eyes wide, and then she leans up on her tip-toes and presses a kiss against his cheek, half-rough with the promise of stubble and half smooth, and her heart thuds loudly in her chest as she lowers herself back down. 

“I…” she begins, her voice barely over a whisper. “I’m glad you like it.”

Kuroo nods jerkily and then pulls back, shoving his hands into his pockets, with a nervous, wild grin.  “I…” He begins before he stops, wetting his lips. “I’m glad she’s okay.”

“I am too.” She says smiling softly up at him, and as they stay staring at each other her stomach rumbles loudly and she jumps from the surprise of it as Kuroo snorts and smirks. “I… it’s Asuka.” She says, flushing pink with embarrassment.

He raises an eyebrow, amusement crawling over his face. “Is that so?” He asks. “What’s Asuka hungry for?”

Yachi pauses for a moment, a hand over her stomach as she pokes at her mind. “Pickled vegetables and a salmon bento.” She says and Kuroo grins. “And a melon soda.”

“Let’s not keep her waiting, shall we?” He says, gesturing to the car and Yachi grins, jogging around to the passenger side before she slips inside, book in her lap and a hand rested carefully over her stomach. 

* * *

She calls Kiyoko from outside the 7/11, the artificial lights glaring down at her as she lets a fresh tirade of tears fall down her cheeks as she tells Kiyoko everything, but Kiyoko isn’t upset or mad, she’s just glad that Yachi is okay and for that she is immensely relieved.

“Yacchan,” Kiyoko says, her voice still half-coated in sleep. “Just promise you’ll tell me next time, please. You are never bothering me, and you are more important than any stupid test I can re-take." 

Yachi’s heart squeezes. “Okay.” She whispers. “Promise.”

Kiyoko hums and she hears the rustle of sheets. “Did you find out the sex?” She asks.

“I did.” She says, a hand falling against her stomach again. “She’s a girl.”

Kiyoko laughs and she sounds so happy that Yachi laughs around too. “I’m glad to have one more girl added to our pack, and everyone will dote on her.” She says and Yachi knows it’s true, with how happy Kageyama and Hinata seemed, and how Suga was already fretting over her. “Are there any names you like?” 

“Asuka.” Yachi says easily, smiling fondly. “With the kanji for ‘to fly’ and ‘bird’.”

Kiyoko hums happily. “Asuka…” She says, testing the name on her tongue. “It’s fitting for the newest hatchling of a Karasuno graduate, don’t you think? I think it’ll suit her wonderfully.”

“Yes.” Yachi says. “It does.”

She promises to be home soon, and Kiyoko hangs up to get a couple more hours sleep before she needs to head out, and she shoves her phone back in her pocket just as Kuroo exits the shop with two plastic bags, offering one to her.

“You’re really sweet, you know that?” She says, and he seems surprised for a moment before he shrugs. “Buying me breakfast and everything.”

“You were hungry,” Kuroo replies easily as they walk slowly back to the car. “I couldn’t leave Asuka and my Yacchan hungry, Kiyoko would never forgive me.”

Yachi laughs at that, rolling her eyes though her heart squeezes at the way he said ‘ _my Yacchan_ ’. “You’re a dork.”

But eating breakfast with Kuroo in the car at 3am was the happiest she had been throughout the beginning of her pregnancy, and she was sure it had something to do without much he made her laugh.


End file.
